Sunday, June 12, 2005
Bleah...Bored...Anyhow think...
Haiz..
I think I'm too bored that's why I'm thinking rubbish..
How sia..
What only..
Look at the time..
Is 5.38am and I'm not sleeping..
What is this sia..
Haiz..
Wanna know what am I thinking?!
Guess everyone will know who this next person I'll be talking about..
***My thoughts***
When I looked back at those days in school..
Those were the days we had together as friends..
It was a mistake from the start to be together..
Haiz..
What sia..
I can't believe I'm typing this..
*Continue..
I'm not thinking of being together with you..
All I'm thinking of was just to be what we used to be(friends before we were together)..
Talking and laughing over small little things..
Haiz..
But it will never be possible again..
There's this money matter which you will never get over..
And die die also want that money back which I will definitely return it to you but not at this moment when my whole freaking family including me are so broke..
And even if I have that money I need it for something that is more important then returning you as you're not even that broke from what I know..
Haiz..
And even if we could forget about the money matter(which I know you will never)things will never be the same again..
There will always be this gap in between..
We could never laugh like before and not even talk like before..
I will never make the 1st move..
And I doubt you will..
Even so,I will feel awkward and I guess you will definitely feel the same way too..
Maybe not as much as the way I felt coz you've never ill-treated me before..
Even so, I don't even remember it now..
I couldn't remember any of those moments, but well..
I admit I did..
And I don't think I could even accept you for who you are now..
Coz you're so different from who you were before..
Ever since we stopped contacting each other you've change..
Maybe all the while you were like that(which I think is true)..
But the main thing is just that you didn't have that kind of money for you to be who you are now..
Is not that you don't have the money..
You're not spend-thrift(don't know if i spell correctly or not) now as compared to last time..
And that makes the big change in you..
Haiz..
Why am I talking about all this..
*Continue..
I don't know what I want now..
Part of me wanna be back like last time(as friends)..
But other part of me just don't wanna know the person you are now..
Haiz..
*Endz*
What sia..
Gosh..
I guess is the alcohol last night that is making me type all this(not true)..
Haiz..
Sianz..
This is life sia..
All right lah..
W/o a "friend" won't die lah..
So ok lah..
I just don't wish to have any enemies in my life that's all..
Right now she's the only enemy I have which is declared by her..
And sad to say, I find it childish..
Haiz..
Okays..
Time to sleep..
Need to wake up tml to do my work..
Or not won't know what is going on when my lecturers starts teaching new topics and won't be able to catch..
Haha..
Oh..
One thing..
I'm struggling with my Maths..
Which I will practice more tml..
Haiz..
1st time see me so hardworking sia..
This is rare..
My 1st time being so hardworking in my entire schooling life..
Haiz..
What to do..
Going to a engg course is like that..
Maths is super tough and also super important..
Even my sister also don't know how to do coz she didn't even learn it..
By the way I'm learning what those A.Maths students are learning..
So you should know lah..
Ny standard or rather my basic foundation is not even good..
Haiz..
Now youu know why I'm struggling even tho others didn't take A.Maths before they are still able to cope a bit here and there..
Haiz..
Haha..
And today is dumpling festival..
My relatives came to my house..
So my parents cook for them..
And guess what..
I got carbs to eat..
Ahahahaha..
It's so delicious..
Hee..
*yumyum*
People eat dumpling on this festival well I'm eating crabs..
Haha..
;p
Alrighty then..
Got to go..
Good nitez..
ByeZ!!!
Miss everyone whom I know ( -including her?!HER?!They are two different people- ) in this whole wide world..
Haiz..
What ever that is..
Wanna know how long I take to type this entry?!
Near to 50mins..
Haiz..
ByEz!
♥ Purple Love™ addicted to purple at: 5:36 AM
