Saturday, December 22, 2007
hmmm...
So much to say...
But when i sign in, i dunno wat to type...
Haiz...
You're way too beautiful gal...
I cant stop thinking of u every day, every night...
U're always on my mind...
After all this time...
I'm back to normal...
Lol...
I finally thinks of someone every now and then...
I dun have to force myself to think...
SHE just appears in my mind every now and then...
I love being with u, is true...
I love the times we had together, is true...
But...
You're liking someone else which is also true...
Each time i heard of their names, my heart sink...
But i'm contented to have u around these days...
I dunno how long this can last...
I may nt have the energy to wait...
I'm soon becoming who i used to be...
I hate it...
I dun wan that to hpn...
I'm a nobody...
But...
In my heart, it'll always be u...
Noel is scared for me to get into a r/s...
I'm scared myself...
Why am i sucha idiot...
Why do i always have to expect so much from my other half...
Haiz...
What's with me...
I'm so scared yet i really wanna try...
But at the same time i think i'll surly regret...
Staying like this is enough for me...
After all these yrs...
I think it's only this far that i can go...
But i really wanna have u into my life...
Why isit always so difficult to have the one u loved...
Why isit always so difficult to get a long well with the one u love....
There's something wrong with me...
Someone told me...
U're not being possessive, u're just protective over someone u care, something that is urs...
Is that true?
I really dunno...
Haiz...
It's too early to say i love you...
it's too early to say i like you...
When will than be the right time?
I'm just typing without meaning...
Just typing and typing away...
Haiz...
I'm really lucky to know you...
I'm really lucky to go eat with u guys that night...
Or not i wun know u...
I'll never regret whatever i've done...
Because, in the beginning, the choice is mine...
And i've choosen to tag along for supper that night...
There's never a regret knowing you...
♥ Purple Love™ addicted to purple at: 2:14 AM
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
What the hell...
Blogger sux...
I screwed up my blog skin which i cant be bother to edit it anymore...
It was that difficult to edit a blog skin before...
Haiz...
I'm dead tired...
Tired till i read a msg wrongly...
Tired till i talk rubbish and embarrassed myself...
WTH...
Haiz...
Haiz...
Haiz...
"I'm not suppose to love you
i'm not suppose to care
I'm not suppose to live my life wishing you were there
I'm not suppose to wonder where you are or what you do
I'm sorry, I can't help myself cause I'm in Love with You"
SORRY!!!
♥ Purple Love™ addicted to purple at: 5:01 PM
it's just another day... tho i'm contented, still, that doesnt put a smile on my face... WHY?!
It's just another day...
Seating here in my lab...
Thinking how the hell to write this bloody programme...
I should think logically which apparently i can't...
To me, it seems logical but to the programme, it's not...
Haiz...
Brain dead...
Niway, had a night spent at ECP...
I shall not say much...
But i'm contented with what i have...
I'll not ask for much...
I know it was just an act...
I'll get that str8 into my head...
No point saying sorry, u did nothing wrong...
Coz i didnt reject and i'm the type of person who dunno how to say NO to ppl...
It just hurt so much aft seeing the sorry...
I dunno why...
And i alr know it very well myself that is impossible...
Why am i still holding onto something i know that it will nv work...
Why is there still that 0.0000000000000000001% of hope that i'm hanging onto...
I've nv learn frm this mistake that hpns within this 3 freaking yrs...
It have been years since i last felt the pain in my heart...
It's really piercing into my heart like nobody's business...
Haiz...
Niway it's nothing new lah...
I'm getting use to such things...
I will feel numb or dun even feel a thing after sometime...
I've been thru this[single life] for 3 yrs...
I dun see why cant i go thru this agn for another yr[and still counting on]...
Haha...
madness...
I'm so tired...
Just typing for the sake of typing...
Just to show that i'm doing some "programming" whereby i'm blogging away...
Lol...
Killing time...
Killing time...
HELP~~~
I need an expert in programming to help me get thru this FYP...
Haiz...
Everytime when i get something done, i'll get stuck at the next step...
I'll take days to get that thing right before i move on and get stuck agn at another stage...
Why is that so...
Each time i got it right, i'll thinks that i'm beginning to think like a programmer...
But when i got stuck, i thinks that i'm just living in self denial, whereby the fact is i dunno anything abt programming at all...
Haha...
All luan bom wan lor...
Then heng sway can work or not then like that lor...
Lol...
BTH myself...
Where got ppl so BHB de lor...
Haiz...
SELF PRAISE IS INTERNATIONAL DISGRACE
Very long nv use this line alr...
Lol...
♥ Purple Love™ addicted to purple at: 11:31 AM
Monday, December 17, 2007
Haiz~~~
It has been ages since i last blog...
Well, i have nothing much to update...
Ppl falling in love, ppl falling out of love...
That's what have been happening recently...
I'm so bored in sch...
I dunno wat my mind is going thru...
Me and her/s is alr the past...
Why are they still kping me hanging on...
Doing things to make my heart sway...
Doing things to hold me back from moving on...
When i know so much that it is totally impossible to get together agn...
I dunno what i want...
I'm not sure if my feelings for HER is for real...
I'm so scared to step into a r/s agn...
I dun want history to return...
I dun wanna go back to who i used to be...
i want to be who i am...
If who i am is what i was...
Then i'll nv be in a r/s ever agn...
It was scary...
I'm scared myself now for who i was before...
Haiz...
What am i to do...
Continue missing YOU whereby YOU alr like someone else...
Continue with this feeling or just treat it as a passerby...
Continue with this feeling and act as if nothing's wrong...
Do i,
Stop contacting you/s and concentrate on YOU...
But the prob is why do you/s still contacting me...
Altho we can be frens, but truth is, i cant let go...
I'm not one who can just let go so easily...
One r/s after another is to cover the other person and pretend to move on...
Truth is, i cant get over a few of them...
I still wanna know abt them...
That's why i am single for more than 3yrs...
Mayb i'm one who can nv be in a r/s...
i'm better off being alone, isit true?!
Haiz...
I'll kp this lil secret in my heart...
If ever there's a chance, i guess i'll take it...
But i dunno if i can afford to have a gf and support HER...
Haiz...
I dunno if being with me will have xin fu not...
Haiz...
That's the reason why i dun wanna have a gf too...
This shit is so sickening...
Why must ppl love here and there...
At times i envy those who have gf wan lah...
At times i oso find that single is always the best...
♥ Purple Love™ addicted to purple at: 11:52 AM
